Be Water, My Friend
“Empty your mind.
Be formless, shapeless, like water.
You put water into a cup; it becomes the cup.
You put water into a teapot; it becomes the teapot.
You put it into a bottle; it becomes the bottle.
Water can flow or it can crash!
Be water my friend” – Bruce Lee
I don’t think I’ve ever had idols. No, I really don’t think I have. Somehow I’ve always had the feeling that idols can limit a person’s vision of how far they want to “go” in life. Maybe that’s the wrong approach, who knows…
I prefer to say I’ve had some role models, somehow it sounds gentler and more down-to-earth to me than “idols.”
Bruce Lee was definitely (and still is!) one of those people. He gifted the film world some of the best action films, promoted martial arts (developed his own fighting style) and what not…
But he was also a great thinker, perhaps it’s fair to say a philosopher too, who left us numerous wise thoughts and guidelines that are very applicable even today.
“Using no way as way, having no limitation as limitation.”
His daughter, Shannon Lee, was small when her father died. But through the outlines of memories of him, her mother’s stories about him, his films, and perhaps (most of all) his writings, she could get an impression of what a great and wise person her father was (but far from being perfect).
And she decided in this book to address one of his perhaps best and most famous principles, which she named the book after.
“Be Water, My Friend.”
Saying this book is an attempt at recycling and/or exploiting Bruce’s success (and his thoughts) with the aim of additionally earning money, perhaps wouldn’t be a surprise if most people thought that.
“Be Water, My Friend” is one of those books you’d most likely overlook, unless you’re a Bruce Lee fanatic and collect everything about him.
But that would be a great sin, truly.
The book is incredibly brilliant, easy to read and clearly developed, with focus on how Shannon Lee experiences some of her father’s principles and precepts, and then (meaningfully) transfers them to everyday life. Perhaps because Shannon also struggled with many things in her life. Maybe she wasn’t hungry and had a comfortable life, but she had some other challenges and crises, both psychological and physical.
“Be Water, My Friend” could be an example of a true self-help book, but in a positive sense.
“Believe me that in every great achievement there are always obstacles, big and small, and the reaction a person shows to such obstacles is what’s important, not the obstacle itself. I learned that being challenged means only one thing, and that’s what your reaction to it is.”
Although the concept itself of “be water” is equally simple and complex (on one hand, being adaptable, but on the other hand, constantly going forward and not allowing Ego to control you), Shannon develops it very nicely and connects it with other Bruce’s thoughts (like the previously mentioned). And what’s great is that Bruce’s thoughts aren’t just thrown into this book, but are as if they’re exactly where they should be, and then Shannon takes them and nicely explains them and connects them with something from life.
“We must find truth when studying a problem. The problem is never separate from the answer; the problem is the answer.”
The author will ask quite a few questions in this book (and which we should, in fact, ask ourselves more often) that will make you self-reflect and question your approach to life and confronting challenges.
What’s also commendable for Shannon Lee and the book “Be Water, My Friend” is that the work also has that personal note, because Shannon will (moderately) share her challenges too. Likewise, she won’t deal too much with biographical details from her father’s life, but will touch on some key moments that, most likely, were turning points for how to change his approach to confronting challenges, whether as an actor, or as a martial arts master, and above all, as a person. Likewise, Shannon in one part of the book describes in a few strokes the imperfect sides of her father, but also how he tried to prevent them.
It’s interesting to see Shannon’s view of her father from the position that Bruce Lee, perhaps (excessively) the most confident man in the world (I think only Muhammad Ali also had that overly confident, not to say mildly theatrical, attitude), could precisely become such because he “exercised” his mind as well as his body. Shannon herself says that “Bruce Lee was phenomenal because he tirelessly worked on remaining phenomenal.” He believed incredibly much in the power of affirmations/i.e. positive statements he would write down or say aloud, i.e., “with all his heart he believed in the power of autosuggestion and positive direction” and creating rituals that would maintain his focus and enthusiasm.
“I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once. But I fear the man who has practiced one kick 10,000 times.”
The book is divided into ten chapters (and if you know Bruce Lee’s work at all, maybe you’ll be able to guess what they’re about):
- The Way of Water
- Empty Your Cup
- The Eternal Student
- The Opponent
- The Tools
- The Obstacle
- The Rainstorm
- The Living Void
- The Way of Intercepting Fist
- My Friend
By the way, Shannon Lee will greatly emphasize the significance of “empty cup,” i.e., how important it is to be open-minded to receive new information, but also readiness to leave Ego aside and our attitude that we already have the “answer” to everything, as well as willingness to discard some of our (pre)conceptions.
Also, the chapter “The Tools” is truly conceived in a simple and practical way, yet with enough space left for you to adapt the techniques described in this book to your style.
I’d like to share with you one more beautiful thought of Bruce Lee:
“Faith is a state of mind that can be maintained by self-discipline. Faith can be encouraged or created by repeating instructions to the subconscious through the principle of autosuggestion. This is the willful development of the feeling of faith.”
Simply, the book “Be Water, My Friend” is written so everyone can recognize themselves in it and easily connect with the author’s thoughts and her late father’s. It doesn’t matter what gender you are, it doesn’t matter whether you’ve trained martial arts or not, it’s completely irrelevant whether you’re a fan of Bruce Lee’s character and work or not, the book in all its depth and (somewhat) philosophical approach is simply… well, simple.
Whether you’re looking for some guidelines on a private or professional level (Bruce Lee worked equally on developing himself, but “himself as a business”), the book will simply fit you and I believe will give you some interesting guidelines.
For some inexplicable reason, the book really delighted me. So much that, besides my standard underlining and marking of parts, after a couple of days it was read again, and the second time I marked with a pen even more important, more essential parts.
“Be Water, My Friend” deservedly ended up on my famous “shelf,” and I don’t doubt I’ll occasionally return to it.
And you, my dear friend, what is your favorite Bruce Lee quote? 🙂
Bruce Lee website
Book price: Vulkan | Makart
Ratings (and purchase) on foreign sites: Goodreads | Amazon | Audible | Waterstones | Barnes & Noble
