Etiquette (Bon Ton)

Le bon ton


Yes, I understand. We are now in the 21st century. Technology and new generations are changing the world. Nowadays, everything is at our fingertips; rarely is anything left a secret. On television and in the media, reckless behavior, promiscuity, and making a fool of oneself are glorified—all in pursuit of instant fame and easy money. Thuggish, aggressive, and impudent behavior of criminals and failures is being ingrained in us as normal, even socially acceptable and modern. There’s a disregard (and disrespect) for everyone except oneself and the occasional (misguided) idol.

Do not be that person, dear reader. Rise above it. Be better than most. Be a true role model. Be Etiquette personified! 😀

I know you might say, “Old values are extinct, overtaken by time, technology, and people.” And you wouldn’t be entirely wrong. Perhaps some values have no place or time in the periods to come. However, certain values can adapt to modern times. And some universal values will never be overrun by time… unless we allow it.

You might not have the chance to dine at a royal court, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t know how to behave in a restaurant, how to use cutlery, and how to treat the restaurant staff.

It might be useful to know that a waiter you want to call over to order or pay the bill is not to be called “Boy” or “Kid”. Of course, in today’s world, being overly formal with them might be excessive, but you can always call them politely. The phrase “excuse me” isn’t just for apologizing for mistakes; it can also be used to attract attention.

No, you’re not some “cool dude” for munching loudly, burping, talking or laughing loudly, or (God forbid) talking on the phone in a cinema. If you care about the opinion of a few rascal friends around you, go ahead, behave like that. But rest assured, you will be seen by others as uncultured and selfish.

A true loser.

I’ve always found it hilarious how some people in theaters applaud (on almost) every comic line of the actors. Of course, why would it be important for the actor to have silence to concentrate on their role (“Oh, aren’t we sarcastic today” – note of the subconscious). I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t like someone clapping, shouting comments, or talking, say, when you have to present a project to your boss that your job depends on, or, for example, during an exam that determines your annual grade? (“Bro, you know I’m always for sarcasm and provocation, but just to let you know, even sarcasm isn’t really according to etiquette” – note of the subconscious).

When you are on a date with a girl/woman/friend, don’t enter or exit a building like Tarzan, always first. Nor like some pushover, always entering and exiting last. Be a gentleman, always enter a building ahead of a woman and exit after her (and hold the door while she exits, for heaven’s sake!). If you’re curious why this is so, do some research.

When you need something, ask nicely and request it, instead of just saying “Give me! I need it! I want it!” Etiquette, please!

The internet is a marvel! It has enabled us to express our opinion on everything that interests us and to exchange opinions. I said EXCHANGE OPINIONS, not to insult, bicker, and argue with everyone who doesn’t share the same view as us, calling them offensive names. Even if you come across such a person on a forum, social network, chat, video game, or wherever, don’t stoop to their level. As we youngsters say, just chill out; that person isn’t worth your time. There’s a nice word for this – netiquette.

I must share an anecdote with you, dear reader. There once was a girl. Beautiful, stunning, smart, she was captivating. And sly and cunning as ever. She could wrap anyone around her little finger. What she said next stuck with me: “A poor gentleman who knows when to hold my coat and pull out my chair has a better chance of taking me to bed than a rich, arrogant braggart who flaunts fame and cash.” Someone asked her why, and she laughed. “It’s simple. Because I know how the gentleman will treat me in bed, and after.”

An interesting girl.

All in all, keep this in mind, whether you are a man or a woman. You have at least three paths before you:

Young man, you can develop into an arrogant jerk. The other extreme is a prince on a white horse (cliché personality). Or perhaps a middle way – “the gentleman.”
Young lady, the same applies to you. There are paths of the uncultured hag and the “spoiled princess.” And then there’s the middle way – “the lady.”

Middle paths don’t sound bad in this case, do they? And all it takes is a little attitude, self-confidence, common sense, general culture and education. And maybe a little booklet on etiquette, right? 🙂



And the question for you, dear reader, is simple: Which path do you wish to take?


(Originally reviewed: 22/10/2018)

Author: admin

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